Thursday, October 9, 2014

It's All Fun and Games till Someone Gets Hurt

During lunch one day, a female 5th and a male 4th grader decided to approach a group of 8th grade girls and have an interesting but out of hand conversation with them. At this point a few other girls accumulated together around the 2 like bees gathering around a field of unpollinated flowers. The duo thought they had as much power over them as the president as they burst out in nonsensical insults such as“Oh you wear glasses, nerd!” or “You have pimples, your face is just one giant wart”. Why were they doing this? Did they believe that this would offend the 8th graders? To find out more, I interviewed a witness of the event, 8th grader Sofia says “I thought they were mean and I think they didn’t fully understand what they were doing, when they grow up I think they need to understand that making fun of people can have a long lasting effect” . So the question that you may be asking currently is; ‘Bullying, how does it impact the victim and do the bullies realize what exactly they are doing?’

This is why bullying is a problem mainly with students, if they are not educated from a young age then they could cause a lot of harm to someone’s life in the future, pain that cannot be mended over a short period of time. According to recent statistics, approximately thirty percent of students in the United States are involved in bullying on a regular basis either as a victim, bully or both. Statistics also show that 1 out of 5 kids admit to being a bully and considering this doesn’t include the ones that remain quiet about their actions this is a considerably large amount. While there are many definitions of the term ‘bullying’ , it is essentially characterized by one or more people acting in a negative way towards a vulnerable peer. There are so many opinions on the subject matter, so I asked a few anonymous 8th grade students to share their thoughts. “In my eyes, bullying is just a way to make the bully feel better about himself, done in a very wrong way” , “Bullying is bad. It is done by people who are sadistic and are sometimes not even aware they do it” another said. The results seemed to be very similar, an expected reaction because as children are getting older they are realizing the full impact bullying can have. Dr Delphine Koh, A senior psychologist (Clinical) who works in Department of Psychological Medicine, Child and Adolescent Mental Wellness Service in KK Women’s and Children’s Hospital says; “Some behavioral and emotional responses to bullying include trying to avoid peers or situations in school, getting anxiety attacks, having difficulty sleeping at night, crying every time one recalls the bullying incident, and self harm or suicidal behaviors”

The impact can have a very strong and long lasting effect on the victim’s perception of themselves. A well known example of this is the Amanda Todd incident. Amanda once flashed on a webcam because she was convinced by a viewer . She received a lot of unnecessary backlash from this event. The emotional pain from this situation was too much for her too handle and quoted directly from the transcript of the video she made before she committed suicide “I overdosed, In hospital for 2 days, I’m stuck, what's left of me now, nothing stops. I have nobody ”. Its difficult to understand what she truly went through but judging by the way she described her feelings it made many feel a lot of sympathy towards the girl, sadly by the time so many people were aware of her incident it was too late. There’s no need to bully someone for their mistakes, especially so much so to the point when they have lost the will to live.

Bullying is a worldwide problem and it is an issue that is most likely is going to be around for years to come, no matter what we try to do people still believe that by bringing others down they will raise their own self-esteem in the process. Bullies have different reasons as to why they decide to do what they do, it may be because you think its ‘cool’. It may be because you have something going on in your own life that you need to make up for by letting another person feel the same pain you are. No excuse that you have gives you a real reason to bully someone. You don’t understand that something that was so harmless to you could have gone one step too far for the opposing side of it.

In some cases it goes so far down the scale that after it’s happened there’s nothing that you or anyone can do about it. There are so many things you could do to help prevent bullying or at least make a small difference. Offer a shoulder to cry on or just smile at them and ask them how they are. That’s all you have to do. Expert Dr Delphine Koh shares her message on what can be done to prevent bullying, this is what she had to say; “Whole school policies are one of the more effective ways to prevent bullying. A clear message has to be made that bullying in any form is not accepted. Encourage children to speak up when they get bullied. Having awareness and positive involvement of adults (e.g, teachers, principals, school counselors and parents) when instances of bullying are reported helps make the school a safe environment for speaking up against bullies”. Bullying can stop, its your decision whether you want to work for it or not, realize that what you’re doing as a bully can deeply change a person’s life entirely , make that conclusion and resolve it before its too late. After all blowing out someone else’s candle won’t make yours shine any brighter.


By Sneha

2 comments:

  1. I really like how you got your issue and cause across in your writing. You really show why it is such a large issue and how people can overcome this. You really portray your passion for this problem through your writing and I think you can really inspire people with this article. I really like how you added the 'Amanda Todd' incident as it really shows this is a real-life topic and this further engages the readers.

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  2. To elaborate on the Amanda Todd situation, I think it was a tragic issue that a lot of people face today. I think that people believe that one mistake can change your life around which I agreed with, but I don't think that the mistake should determine life or death. I think one of the things bullies don't realise is how much it is affecting the victim. Honestly, if Amanda was getting the support she needed from her friends instead of being abandoned by them, she might have still lived. I learnt that from your article that you should support people and encourage them if they are a victim and not judge them- I think this is an extremely important topic that you tackled on very well.

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